Conflicts between partners is a common reason of ED

Problems in the sexual sphere happen almost to every man. In most cases, difficulties with erection are temporary. They may arise from fatigue, stress, etc. If a man regularly confronts with the inability to perform sexual intercourse, then it is worth to think hard because this is the first sign of a disease called erectile dysfunction. Erectile dysfunction poses a lot of problems for a man and his partner. At the same time, it can have not only physiological reasons but psychological as well.


How problems in personal relations lead to ED?

Psychogenic erectile dysfunction arises because of various psychological factors. Difficulties at work, domestic stresses, conflicts in the family, chronic fatigue, dissatisfaction with life can lead to an erection disorder. Symptoms are episodic and appear suddenly, usually in the background of problems in the relationship with the partner.

Periodically, almost every man has to face problems in the intimate sphere. According to experts, erectile dysfunction most often occurs in cases where a man does not want to have sex, and his partner insists on it. And if this happens, it does not mean that a man does not love and does not want his woman. If this phenomenon is not systematic, then there is nothing wrong with the man’s potency.

One of the serious causes of impotence is self-doubt. If a person accepts himself as he is, then nothing prevents him from determining himself – to speak honestly about his conditions, needs or lack of readiness for sex. And if a person does not think about anything bad in this regard, he is most likely to be able to convey his thoughts and feelings to the partner and agree with him. But most men who face problems of psychological impotence do not accept themselves as they are. They think that they are “not good enough” for them to be loved, respected, appreciated. And that they must prove their “goodness” to everyone around them.

This means that a man does not consider himself sufficiently full, and therefore thinks that he must prove to his partner that he is a real man. And that is why he decides that he must always be ready, when only she will give her consent or show the initiative. Accordingly, internal self-doubt can become a constant cause of the growing gap between the body, its real needs on the one hand, and the mind, ideas about oneself, about “how it should be”, and emotions about it, on the other hand.

Why every man needs to be praised by his partner to have strong potency?

Uncertainty about one’s own usefulness, importance, sufficient “goodness” is an excuse to seem better, stronger, etc. The desire to show the partner top quality potency at any time of the day and night is in the hope of greater acceptance, approval, praise and love. However, a man may be disappointed because the partner does not know that you are trying to overcome fatigue, fears, etc. And she fairly and reasonably believes that you just want it too. And therefore there is nothing to admire – everything is natural and usually.

A man who does not receive the expected enthusiasm and praise is disappointed even more and often gets even more afraid that his woman will not be satisfied enough and will not praise his male power. And, as a consequence, the fear of failure and frustration on the part of the partner can make the entire situation even more tense.

How important is it to choose the right partner you can trust?

Very often there is such a situation: an erection occurs when a man is masturbating but the body refuses to work when a man has relations with a woman. What is the difference between these two situations? The fact that a man is able to receive satisfaction on his own suggests that everything is in order physiologically with him. After all, if the erection disappears in the presence of another person – then there is something in this relationship that does not allow to relax.  Perhaps it’s a matter of time – trust will come later. But then you should not hurry with sex. And maybe – it’s not the partner you can trust. For some reason, the stereotype “you need to be able to do anything with anyone if you want it at least a little” has penetrated into the consciousness of a large number of men.

However, if you cannot relax in the presence of a person, it means that you do not trust this person. You expect only negative assessment, rejection, criticism, bullying or humiliation – consciously or not. If in your life there was an experience of more or less satisfactory sex, and now, at this time of life and specifically with this partner something goes wrong – an occasion to reflect on precisely these relations. Problems with trust arise not only in the early stages of the relationship, but also at later stages, when passion passes.



The easiest solution is to talk. Do not dismiss the situation of a one-time loss of erection, saying “nothing, just tired, another time it will be fine,” but talk about what you worry about in your relationship.


This article was written by Dr. Breslin, a private certified urologist and Fellow of the American College of Surgeons, a former research fellow at the Harvard Institute, and the author of scientific articles related to urinary incontinence and bladder control.
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